By Monica Swanson
(Editor’s Note: As we approach fall and settle into a new medical year, schedules are set, kids go back to school and travel plans are made. For my physician family, the anticipation of a vacation helps during the busy season. One of our regular contributors has just returned from a summer of adventure with her four boys and has a few tips for the busy physician family on planning travel.)
When you think of traveling with kids, what are the first words that come to mind?
For most of us it is a real mix.
When my kids were all young, I remember eagerly anticipating family vacations…counting down the days, and packing all of the things with visions of a most meaningful, fun and memorable experience for everyone in the family.
Halfway through the trip, I’d find myself sleep-deprived, grumpy and dreaming of a vacation from my vacation.
Oh the kids have wonderful memories of those trips, that’s for sure. They still talk about the trips we took to Grandma and Grandpa’s house, or Disneyland, or the mountains. And I suppose that is why we do it. The kids’ memories make it all worthwhile.
But for the grownups in the crowd? Traveling with little ones can sometimes best be described as a sacrificial act.
Now that my boys are mostly older (the five year old is keeping me young, and humble), our travels have changed significantly. This summer all four boys and I spent five weeks in California for one of my boy’s national surf competitions. I literally sighed in relief each time the older teens would pack up the rental car, haul our bags into hotel rooms and help manage the youngest one. I thought back to how vacations looked when they were all young and counted my blessings.
(My husband was back home working for most of the month, but he was able to join us for the middle part of our trip. We’ve learned to be flexible on these things.)
Of course traveling with teens can have its own challenges: there can be bickering and moodiness and hunger–always a lot of hunger…but the one guarantee is family travels will never be boring.
Regardless of the ages of your kids, and whether you’re traveling purely for fun, for a sports tournament, job obligation or family reunion, I have learned a few general rules that help me stay sane in the midst of it all:
FOUR WAYS TO PLAN FOR A SANE AND SUCCESSFUL FAMILY VACATION
1. DEFINE THE TRIP. Who is the trip for (kids, adults or both?) What is the purpose? (Fun, work? Sporting event?)
Then…adjust expectations accordingly. Be realistic about what you’re doing, how much sleep you’re likely to get and how many meltdowns might occur in the hour-long line for It’s a Small World. If the trip is focused on work or necessary family meetings, offer some rewards to the kids for good and patient behavior (and if the trip is focused on kids, plan some reward-incentives for mom and dad as well!).
2. PACK IN ADVANCE. Don’t be like me and pack your bags the night before you leave on a trip. That might have worked just fine before you had kids, but when your simple suitcase suddenly is home to all of the medicines, toys, books and snacks…packing the night before you leave can push you to exhaustion before you ever begin the trip.
Pack smart. Consider what you can get by without (twelve board books. an entire set of legos) and what is absolutely essential. (Medication. Underwear.)
3. PLAN WITH FLEXIBILITY IN MIND. Depending on your personality, you might prefer to travel with a fully organized itinerary, printed out with hour-by-hour activities. Some scheduling is a really good idea. However, whether you’re traveling with a baby or a teenager, kids will always throw some wrenches in our plans. In other words, your trip will most likely not go as planned.
A loose plan will have important events, appointments, or must-do items on it, with plenty of room for spontaneity, down time, or (be realistic) getting lost, hungry or needing a big family time out.
4. SCHEDULE SOME YOU-TIME FOLLOWING THE FAMILY VACATION. Before you leave on your trip, I highly recommend scheduling some alone time when you return. Schedule a massage, or a dinner with a friend a day or two after you get back. If you can line up a sitter or somehow plan a day to peacefully unpack, do laundry and grocery shop, do it! In the midst of the traveling madness, it really does help to know that your return home won’t be equally overwhelming.
One thing is for sure: I’ve never regretted a family vacation! Some of our greatest family memories are from times we got away together. But it can really help to go into a family vacation with some realistic expectation.
So get planning, be flexible and make some memories! (And don” forget the massage upon your return.)
With Aloha,
Monica
Monica Swanson lives with her very active family on two acres in the country on Oahu, Hawaii. You can read more about Monica and her discussions on parenting, healthy marriage and recipes at her blog: www.monicaswanson.com.