Finding Joy as a Spouse of a Physician – Rekindling your Sense of Self!


by Maria Lesetz, Certified Life Coach for Doctors

It was a Wednesday afternoon and “John” was calling me for his first coaching session to discuss the specific challenges he was facing as a result of being married to a physician. He was not sure what to expect from the coaching but had indicated prior to the session that he felt stuck in a recurring pattern of negative and unproductive thoughts and behavior. He was the house “Mom” of 3 little boys. He also fixed everything and kept the household running in an orderly fashion. But something was missing. His motivation level was at its all time low. He kept making excuses for why he could or would not do tasks that needed his attention. He couldn’t even perform activities that he once enjoyed. And on top of that when his physician wife came home from a long and grueling day, he was there to support her as she spewed how stressful her day was.

His sense of “self’” and “independence” was lost. Everything surrounded around his spouse’s hectic schedule and making sure that he had everything under control. But he wasn’t doing things that brought him pure joy. That “joie de vivre” was missing!

The first thing we coached around was that he had a choice when it came to the type of thoughts he had on a daily basis and what he was choosing to laser focus on. We discussed the power that resided in that focus and how at any given moment he could choose to pivot to what he appreciated about his life, instead of complaining about what wasn’t working.

“John” knew that his life was a good one when he looked at the bigger picture. He has a lovely wife who has a wonderful career that for the most part she loves. They have three little boys who are the light of their lives who are healthy and happy. They live in a beautiful home on lots of property that is secluded and is their dream home. But he never focused on this. He just got caught up in a pattern of focusing on what wasn’t working in his life and what he resented. He was rooted in what I call the “lack” vibe (i.e., where you are focused more on what you don’t have as opposed to the abundance of positive things you do have).

Here is where the pivoting to the positive began and his motivation started to rekindle. “John” realized in that first session that his thoughts were creating his reality and that the most important thing for him to change was the nature of those thoughts. It was a pretty powerful ah-hah for him!

Here were a few other tips I shared during that session:

1)   Pivot your focus from “worrying and complaining” to “appreciating and feeling blessed” for what you DO have.

2)   Envision the way you want your life to be. Feel the essence of already having that before it even comes to you. You can tap into that feel good place at any point in time, especially when you need to be uplifted. Visualization exercises are very powerful tools for attracting more of what you desire to have in your life.

3)   Make sure you add into your life … activities, events, hobbies and passions that bring YOU joy, no matter how busy you are. You MUST add that slice of joy to your pie of life in order to honor what’s in your heart and soul. When you do, you will fuel your inner energy and feel so much lighter and fulfilled, rekindling your sense of “self” and fulfillment.

When you make your happiness a top priority and deliberately choose better feeling thoughts each and every day, your motivation level will sky rocket, your sense of self will be rekindled and both you and your physician spouse will experience a much more rewarding and fulfilling life together, where you will be able to thrive through any adversity that comes your way.

If you are a spouse or significant other of a physician, I invite you to apply for a complimentary breakthrough session with me on …

“Finding Joy as a Spouse of a Physician and Rekindling Your Sense of Self!”


Click here to schedule your complimentary session today.



Maria Lesetz is one of the top Law-of-Attraction Health & Happiness Coaches and founder of Lovin’ Life – a coaching company that specializes in facilitating powerful, personal transformations in physical and emotional wellbeing. She has gone through a comprehensive Physician Life Coach Training program and holds the special designation of Certified Life Coach for Doctors.  She is also a Motivational Speaker and has been a frequent guest expert on radio and Fox News.

Maria helps her physician clients and their families to avoid and manage burnout, reduce stress and to re-gain a healthier work/life balance improving the overall happiness level and quality of the physician family as a whole.

3 thoughts on “Finding Joy as a Spouse of a Physician – Rekindling your Sense of Self!

  1. Donna Baver Rovito says:

    Thanks, Maria, for reminding us that negative thoughts bring us down and positive thoughts raise us up.

  2. You know, Donna … I think that we all know that intellectually, but unfortunately many of us get caught up in the stress that we experience on a daily basis and do not take the time to stop, take a breath, decompress and really do what will serve our own health and well-being. And from my experience of working with physicians, it is quite common where they put their own overall health and well-being on the back burner and just continue to push through their hectic schedule, not thinking about how it will impact them and their family in the long run. And as a result, they reach a tipping point where burnout is their every day experience.

    So, it’s a lot more than just thinking positive – it’s a way of life, where you deliberately choose to pivot to a better feeling thought, even in those tough times. It actually takes some practice – it is something that most people in this world are NOT doing (i.e., being deliberate about what they think and feel so that it benefits their future).

    Sure, it’s easy to say “think positive thoughts”, but there is a spiritual growth path to get there if your natural default is to think negatively. And for some of my physicians, given what they are surrounded by on a daily basis, this takes some work. But it can be done and it positively impacts not only the Physician’s overall health and well-being, but the entire family’s overall happiness level!

  3. You can have too much of a good thing.